My friend wants to go to Las Vegas this spring for a guys trip. It sounds like a good time, but one of the guys always starts a fight or does something stupid. Should I still go?

JR: Have you seen The Hangover? That documentary proves Vegas is hell. Mom will never let me go.

JW: Just start a fight as soon as you get to the airport and quietly give him a “yo momma” burn. Hopefully he’ll go in for the punch and security will handle the problem. It’s natural selection.

JT: It’s up to you. If you go, go with a positive attitude and maybe it will rub off on him. Just know that you’re running the risk of being stuck with him if he does have an outburst.

I’m going nuts. My roommate is awesome and is one of my best friends, but they never help clean or with any yard work. I’ve made several nudges, but nothing is changing. What should I do?

JR: Go out of your way to not clean or do any yard work. Once it smells like a dumpster fire, your roommate will move out, and you can find someone new to do the work.

JW: Set a netted trap by the television. When your roommate tries to Netflix and chill, they Netflix and won’t. Let them down when they promise they’ll start picking up a rake.

JT: Whatever you do, don’t get passive aggressive. Just sit them down and be clear that it’s teamwork. If they’re not on the same team, it’s time to find a new housing situation.

It’s so hard to make Valentine’s Day plans. What is your ideal date?

JR: She is 5’3”… blue eyes… black hair… has a huge… heart… makes a mean lasagna… let’s dad hog the remote. Wait, what does Valentine’s Day have to do with a date?

JW: Tinder. My ideal date is Tinder.

JT: That’s a hard one. Honestly, staying in and watching a movie sounds great to me. Will that do it for her? Probably not. It’s fun to do something different, like ice skating. Then you look soft, like Drake.

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